Drawing God?

DRAWING GOD?

  by

  Wilde Blue Sky

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  PUBLISHED BY:

  Drawing God?

  Copyright © 2010 by Wilde Blue Sky

  The author would like to thank Louise, Kate and Lynne for their support.

  Note to reader - if you appreciated this short story please, if you are able, make a small donation to a charity of your choice.

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  Drawing God?

  Hue-Bris slowly opened his eyes. He was standing fully clothed, in a completely silent white open landscape. The air was perfectly still, not too hot nor too cold. He felt oddly serene, with no need to rush or worry. How did he get here? He couldn't remember getting out of bed.

  His logical mind quickly determined he must be dreaming. He waited, expecting the dream to unfold. But strangely nothing happened.

  He must explore. As he turned he saw a white table, where an angelic child, in a white lace dress, was sitting, bent forward, intensely scribbling. Blonde curly locks hung in front of her face, obscuring her actions. She seemed both familiar and totally unknown.

  'What are you doing?' He asked.

  Without looking up, she replied, 'I'm drawing God.'

  Hue-Bris laughed to himself. What a bizarre dream. 'You can't draw God. No one can know what God looks like, because God doesn't exist.'

  The girl continued to work. 'When I have finished, you'll be able to see what God looks like.'

  Hue-Bris considered the girl's child-like logic then dismissed it. Being a man of science he understood this dream must have some purpose. Maybe it was going to be a chance to go through the logic of his theories or rehearse his well-prepared answers to the religious zealots who always questioned him? But as much as he strained he couldn't think of a single meeting or presentation he was due to give.

  He leaned forward, trying to look at the picture.

  'If you don't believe in God, why do you want to see the picture?'

  'Curiosity. I'm a scientist, Professor of Science at....,' he racked his mind, but couldn't remember where he was a Professor. How strange that he should forget.

  The child spoke again. 'Don't you wish you'd been a proper Doctor or something useful? You will only be remembered for criticising religion. You could have spent your time helping the sick.'

  Hue-Bris smiled to himself. Obviously this was going to be a run through of his well-prepared arguments. He knew his work demonstrating the corrosive nature of religion and its manipulation of society had been worthwhile. He began to put forward his case. 'Religion has been used as an excuse for persecution and wars throughout the years.'

  'But hasn't it also given relief and comfort to many?'

  'But what is the value of false hope?'

  'How can hope be false if people feel it?'

  An image of his mother's deathbed conversation with a church elder forced itself into his mind. He felt a slight twinge of doubt. He dismissed it and continued. 'But if people didn't have false hope surely they would do something to change their lives?'

  'Isn't hope the beginning of change?'

  'No. An understanding of the truth is the beginning of change.' Hue-Bris leaned back, puffed up like a peacock, satisfied that he had won again. He always had to win.

  The child interrupted Hue-Bris's self-satisfaction. 'Don't you think faith can be good?'

  'Faith in something that doesn't exist is delusion.'

  'How can you be so sure?'

  'Science shows us the truth.'

  'Can science show us the meaning of life? Do you think man simply exists to reproduce?'

  Images of childhood friends and past lovers appeared to him. He pushed these memories out of his mind. 'It can show us where we all came from.'

  'Is life on Earth, in all its wondrous variety and beauty, something science can simply explain?'

  Hue-Bris felt more comfortable, as the argument returned to well known theories. 'The functional requirement for the variety of life on Earth can be explained by looking at Darwin's work and the theory of evolution.'

  'The theory of survival of the fittest seems logical, but hasn't it been used for political ends, to oppress certain sections of society?'

  'Yes.' Hue-Bris momentarily considered his short puny body. Was he the fittest?

  'So why is that different from the corrupt use of religion?'

  'Because religion isn't real.'

  'Why couldn't God have created the world and allowed evolution to increase the variety of animals and plants in it?'

  'There is no God. The Big Bang Theory explains how everything was created in the very beginning.'

  'What was before the Big Bang?'

  Hue-Bris flustered, he knew there was no definitive answer, so began explaining the start of the Big Bang, rather than answer the child's question. 'There was an incredibly hot dense singularity. Everything that exists was compacted into a single point.' He closed his fingertips together to indicate a very small size.

  'Couldn't God have created the singularity?'

  'No. God doesn't exist!' He threw up his arms in desperation; the questions were annoying him.

  'Were you there when it happened?'

  'Of course not!'

  'Then how can you be sure? If you didn't see it or experience it, how can you know?'

  'Because science shows us the theory is correct.'

  'But surely science involves man and man can make mistakes or misinterpret results?'

  'That is why we have peer review and debate about important subjects.'

  'But surely you all start from the same idea or concept and use the same data? So wouldn't you all come to the same conclusion?'

  'Not all scientists agree.'

  'Then how do you know you are right?'

  'There is a consensus on what is right.'

  'That just means the majority of you could be wrong. Isn't science just a series of theories that are regularly superseded, refined and altered as people's understanding increases?'

  'Yes, that's true.' Hue-Bris huffed in frustrated agreement.

  'So your theories are based on Man's current understanding. In a hundred years your theories may be replaced as Man's knowledge increases?'

  'Yes.' Hue-Bris hissed through gritted teeth.

  'Isn't science without proof, just another act of faith?'

  'No. Science searches for the truth. Religion is a way for people to try to escape the terror of what they can't explain.'

  'Aren't unproven scientific theories just the same?'

  Hue-Bris's body felt tense, he heart was racing. 'This is pointless! Why am I arguing with a child!'

  'Why did you spend so much of your life arguing against religion and faith?'

  'I have done more than question religion,' he snapped in response.

  'You wrote books. But were you really proud of those books? You wrote about the need for creatures to reproduce and the sacrifices creatures will make for their young. But you only had to look at any proud set of parents to see that.'

  Hue-Bris was offended. He was an internationally respected scientist. 'You're too young to understand the importance of my work. I look at more than immediate parent offspring relationships.'

  'Yes. You looked at the support creatures will offer their immediate society, even if it is not to the individual creature's immediate advantage. But you only had to look at any soldier going into battle to see that.'

  Hue-Bris shook his head in exasperation. 'I promote scientific thought and knowledge. I demonstrate how individuals corrupt mystical beliefs for their own advantage.'

  'You did help to promote other people's scientific work, but you promoted yourself too.'

  'That's unfair. I a
m a figurehead for the advancement of science.' He found it oddly unsettling that the child kept referring to him in the past tense.

  'Why did you name an institution after yourself?'

  'I'm well known. The public recognises my name, so it was sensible to name the institution after me. It instantly gave the institution a public profile.'

  'Wasn't the institution just a way of promoting yourself? Isn't what you did just the same as someone using religious office for their own advantage?'

  'That's unfair! I always use my public standing to promote the advancement of science and not myself.' He pointed accusingly at the child.

  The child hadn't once looked up from her drawing. Hue-Bris was getting more and more flustered. He had always done the right thing, couldn't the child see that? How could a dream be so annoying? He snapped, 'When will this dream be over?'

  'Don't you want to see my drawing?'

  Hue-Bris had a sensation that as soon as he saw the drawing the dream would end.

  The girl handed him the piece of paper; he gazed in amazement. It was a multi-layered image of everyone in the world, everyone who'd ever been, everyone who'd ever be, a constantly changing crystal clear image, morphing from one person to the next.

  'This is amazing.'

  'So are people. Limitless ideas, beliefs and ideals that can co-exist as long as no one thinks they are above everyone else. No one knows the absolute truth.'

  'Religion has been used to oppress and control throughout the ages.' Hue-Bris's voice had lost a large amount of his righteous conviction.

  'Not religion, people's misinterpretations and misreading of faith. Truth faith is letting everyone get on with their own lives. Letting everyone live in peace.'

  'Why isn't this dream coming to end? I've never experienced such a complex dream.' Hue-Bris's voice had a strange pleading tone.

  'This time will never end, until you understand you can't explain and control everything.'

  'What will happen to me then?'

  'You will carry on your journey and complete the circle of life.'

  Suddenly Hue-Bris sensed this wasn't a dream. He looked at the picture and saw an image of his mother. He heard her whisper. 'Believe.'

  An icy feeling of loss entered his body. Hue-Bris shivered. A single tear rolled down his cheek, fell off his chin and landed on his hand. The cold splash of the tear shocked him. He asked, 'I am dreaming?'

  'No.'

  'Am I dead?'

  'How can you be dead? You only believe in rational things.'

  'What are you?'

  'I am whatever you want to call me. Faith, hope, religion, science. I can be anything.'

  Hue-Bris felt scared. Had his work promoting science and rational thought, trying to explain everything through science, been worthless? Had he wasted his life? He wanted to live.

  Before he could ask, the girl said, 'no life is ever wasted. You had your place in the world and now that time is over. Do you want some paper so you can draw? Remember it's only with your heart that you can see truly.'

  The girl gestured to a chair that had appeared at the table. Hue-Bris's legs felt heavy; he sat down and began to draw. He'd only ever constructed scientific diagrams before, but soon he'd drawn a beautiful portrait of his entire family, from grandparents to youngest grandchild. His heart and mind were one. He understood what was important and then slowly he started to drift. What was happening?

  He called out to the child. 'Are you an angel?'

  The child called back. 'You tell me? I thought you scientists knew all the answers.'